Sharing my past has never been easy for me, but I've begun to understand that the work we're doing now is rooted in the contrast of where we've come from.
When I was released from the military in 2014, I remember feeling lost. The culmination of a four-year battle—both physically and mentally—left me struggling to find my place in an organization I no longer fit the arcs of. The haze of years spent on sleeping medications, antidepressants, and sedatives started to lift, revealing a world I didn't recognize anymore.  I'd physically run and marched my body into a state of disability I couldn't simply walk off.
The final day of my 15-year military career was spent leaning against an orderly desk. Not being marched out by my unit, not given a departure with dignity. Rather, the three hollow thumps of a pay clerk's stamp.

An amazing August day in the company of Dolphins... is there anything else to say? The healing that comes from creativity, and the reward in the very action of the pursuit.. This captures the essence of both. Stay peaceful!!

I haven’t posted on Remembrance Day via social media or blogs ever. I didn’t wear medals or distinguishing markings at my local cenotaph for years after release. I locked myself in my own head and only surrounded myself with the people that I felt safe letting in.
I thought I was just being antisocial, but it turns out that the vast majority of the people I served with were doing this as well. There’s an injury at play here that shows itself in ways that people don’t always understand. A quote from a close friend, “I’ve never been more ashamed and proud of the same thing in my life”. That sums it up really well.
One of the biggest traumas for service personnel, is the removal from our community. Our tribe. Being set adrift alone is terrifying, especially when you’re the one rowing the boat. The answer, for me anyway, was to expand my tribe. I started going to outdoor markets in my home town of Lunenburg,  started getting involved in my community and supporting local business. Getting involved with my children’s schools, and the parents of kids the same age. As a result, I’ve started to build my tribe again.

Hello again! I’m slowly working through a PILE of footage that I’ve been compiling for years since my release from the infantry. 
Something I've learned in the past seven years is how to pay attention to a gifted moment. This beautiful July evening stands out in my mind as an example of exactly why I pursue peace with a camera. I had finished supper, and was enjoying the shapes the sun was making as it danced through the pines out behind the house. I was doing dishes by the window and was increasingly distracted by the deep blue sky and lazy clouds on the horizon. 

​This video is from a beautiful warm day in August. A perfect gem in a season full of beach days. I was very fortunate to be in the right place at the right time. 

​Ever since releasing from the military, I’ve discovered a profound peace in my garden. Hands in soil, physical preparation of earth, and of course the reward of what comes up! 
Healthy food and physical activity are so beneficial to my mental well being.
Enjoy.